Authenticity over Perfection

True leadership stems from individuality over perfection that is sometimes imperfectly expressed
(Sheryl Sandberg, COO, Facebook)

What words would you use to describe you? Do you actually know?

Do you still see yourself through 14-year-old eyes or have you moved on?

Those views you formed in your adolescent years tend to stick. Those views made in the adolescent years tend to shape the adult.

Those views form thought patterns and those thought patterns form pathways in our thinking which shape our behaviour – and all of those become more and more ingrained the older we get.

You probably lived in a house while you were growing up! The household itself and the dynamics between the people also formed a lot of those thought patterns and pathways in your head so nowadays you react to stuff and do things in a certain way because that’s how you always did it.

When those views about ourselves or the world around us are pretty negative it is so much easier to draw the curtains, lock the door and hide away from the world than it is to put on a brave face and step outside. And whilst it would be fabulous to only have the good bits and the wins on display to the outside world that is not how life works.

I realise now how exhausting and unnecessary it is trying to wear a mask of perfection because now I see that
1. perfection is not possible
2. Trying to reach an unattainable goal is exhausting and damaging to my well-being and
3. I’m certain God wants us to be free enough to be able to authentically express our individuality - after all that is how He made us.

I don't often manage to express myself perfectly but I am trying. And I think that as long as I am not stepping out to hurt anyone or to cause offence to anyone else then I am ok in doing that.

The bottom line is this…..

People will get offended but my goal is not to offend.

People may get put out or put off by me but that is not my aim.

I will be open with my views and opinions and the whole world can disagree with me, that ok too because I know that I honestly do not step out of the door in the morning with the sole goal of trying to get up peoples noses.

The only way to be everyones friend, all of the time, is to never show my hurts to anyone else, to never say what I think to anyone else, to never have an opinion on anything in the world – ever – and to never mention Jesus in polite conversation.

I CAN’T DO THAT!!

I’m a real person and some of me hurts.. Some hurts have healed completely but some have not. Some days I wake up feeling a bit bruised or a little bit sensitive, maybe a bit prickly or a bit defensive or a bit impatient with the world. When I try and hide that away it doesn’t help the hurt to heal, it just delays the healing process. Similarly, I am a real person with opinions and thoughts and a love for God.

So here I am imperfectly but authentically expressing my individuality with all of the bad bits and good bits. We won’t always agree but that’s ok, we don’t have to agree to show respect, love and kindness to each other.

I hope the world in which you live allows you the freedom to express yourself imperfectly too.